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Headlines from the year 2029!


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Headlines from the year 2029!

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.

White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Baby conceived naturally - -  scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z.  Bush says he will run for President in 036.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $1789 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.       

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.

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Ten years after

In the year twentyfive

twentyfive if man is still alive

If woman can survive they may find.

In the year thirtyfive thirtyfive

Ain't gonna need to tell the truth tell no lies

Ev'rything you think do and say is in the pill you took today.

In the year fortyfive fortyfive

You ain't gonna need your teeth won't need your eyes

You won't find a thing to chew

nobody's gonna look at you.

In the year fiftyfive fiftyfive your arms are hangin' limp at you side

Your legs got nothin' to do

some machines doin' that for you.

In the year sixtyfive sixtyfive

Ain't gonna need no husband won't need no wife

You'll pick your son

pick your daughter too

From the bottom of a long glass tube.

In the year seventyfiveten

If God's a-coming he oughta make it by then

Maybe he'll look around himself and say:

Guess it's time for the judgement day.

In the year eightyfiveten God is gonna shake his mighty head

He'll either say I'm pleased where man has been

Or tear it down and start again.

In the year ninetyfive ninetyfive

I'm kind a wond'rin' if man is gonna be alive

He's taken everything this old earth can give

And he ain't put back nothin'.

Now it's been tenthousand years

man has cried a billion tears

For what he never knew - now man's reign is through.

But through eternal night the twinkling of starlight

So very far away - maybe it's only yesterday.

In the year twentyfive twentyfive if man is still alive

In the year thirtyfive thirtyfive . . .

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hmmmmmmm  I'm  5'9'' and my g/f is 5'6''        and I wonder   am I gonna have a son or daughter  at over 8 feet tall   :haha:

It ain't necessarily so  ! I am 6ft 3in and my ex 5ft 10in  our daughter is 5ft 3 in fully grown

nature has a way of leveling things, including intelligence

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  • 1 year later...

Ressurection.  :cheesy:

Long lost thread I never got to post in. 

Do ya think maybe they'll make ballpoint pens that don't leak all over your dockers when ya leavem in ur pocket and cruise down the road? ...................................dammit!

Heck yeah, its possible now if you pay enough. Stead of getting the cheap stuff bro.  :wink:
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Buy a Cross Pen and be done with the leaking crap. I've had mine for 12 years and have never lost it. You tend not to misplace stuff that cost good money! :wink:

Who does this? Hell, I lose things everyday. I put them in " safe " places, and forget ! I have a good pen around somewhere.

I was thinking more on the lines of a voice activated , hands free ,200 million bit SSL secure device that would instantly upload to your office digital calender, "1MM thin" sized , flash drive multi platform , gaming rig , computer , that contained all my banking , credit, contacts, entertainment media, .........hell, everything, thing, that we all get for free, updated , and exchanged yearly for the newest  thingy , that needed no batteries because it draws power from atmospheric ions, floating around in the gaseous soup we breath.    : )

Sound good?  You cant lose it because it stays attached to your skin for up to six months before needing removed and simply rinsed off in luke warm water.

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Buy a Cross Pen and be done with the leaking crap. I've had mine for 12 years and have never lost it. You tend not to misplace stuff that cost good money! :wink:

It never works that way for me. If I buy a good knife to carry, I always lose it or it is stolen. If I find a piece of shit knife, no one wants to steal it, borrow it, and it seldom disappears.  :wink:
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